See, people just don’t get it.
My wife rocks, which results in helping to make my life rock.
Let’s see, Jodi is at home with Norah during the day, and doing an amazing job of looking after a pretty easy-going baby. I go to work, leaving at about 6:00 AM, coming home between 4:15 and 6:00 at night. I hang out with Norah, and then Jodi and I balance getting dinner ready, bathing Norah and getting her fed and to bed. Some of the responsibilities have changed in the past few weeks as Norah’s sleep routine has evolved, and the two of us have done a mighty fine job of flowing through the changes with ease.
See, now I have a happy easy-going baby, and an amazing and sleep-deprived wife.
So, in order to help Jodi to get some more sleep, I take Norah in the morning on the weekends, until it’s feeding or first nap time. I also take Norah out grocery shopping or to the LCBO, in order to give Jodi some more catch-up time. Then there are the outings that Norah and I go on, which usually involve going to visit friends or family with her, giving Jodi some time to herself.
There are the times that Jodi and I hang out with Norah, just having fun with her, all-the-while talking about stuff. Needs and wants, work-related stuff, silly and serious stuff. Not always world changing, but communicating nonetheless. We read stuff off our iPhone feeds or Facebook, and I bounce food/recipe ideas by Jodi for her brainstorming energy, thoughts on global politics and inappropriate undergarments, and the like.
I have time to create in the kitchen. Cooking and baking. This is something that I love to do. Passionately. Jodi lets me do this because it means that I’m doing something I like, and often the results are positive for all parties. It also means she’s not doing the cooking. But, she doesn’t love the mountain of mess I’m prone to leave behind in the kitchen. I’m working on the “Clean as you go”, but it’s just too hard to keep on top of what I’m doing when going as fast as I go. I’m apt to be doing three or four things at once. As sous chef, line cook, head chef, prep cook and bottle washer, a mess is going to result.
And Jodi steps up and sometimes deals with piles of dirty dishes and prep stuff all over the kitchen. But her doing this means that I have time to do laundry. I’m not going to try and convince anyone that I’m doing the laundry after I’ve spent hours creating in the kitchen and on the BBQ. No, but when I grab Norah in the wee hours on a Saturday or Sunday, I start to get the washing and drying done. This helps to keep costs down (water costs less on the weekend) and means that Jodi can fold the laundry whenever she has time. And if it's feeding time, then I'll head down (as I did today) and cleaned up the mess from last night while Jodi was feeding Norah.
So, we’re once again working together as a well-oiled machine.
With a happy baby. A happy baby that’s started a new sleep routine that seems to be resulting in her being even happier, and a little more independent in starting to sooth herself and sleeping in her crib in her Keith Haring-adorned room.
Keith Haring in the baby’s room! Yet another reason why I love my wife so much.
My wife is amazing. (Almost) perfect for me. I wouldn’t be fooling anyone in saying she’s perfect, since she doesn’t eat fruit. But she eats my cooking. The spectacular and the mundane. The too salty and the too spicy. Because she gets the bigger picture. She trusts me. Implicitly. Perhaps more than I deserve. But she has a sense of who I am and what I’m about, and part of what I want to do with my hyphen (1970 - ????) of life.
I’ve never felt more alive. I’ve never felt more connected with my world, and the world around me. I’ve never been happier. I owe that happiness to a lot of people, but more assuredly my wife is at the top of the list. And Doug Tindall.
There is so much that I learn from Jodi, and that she allows me to teach her. Though, she does seem to ignore random bits of trivia that I share with her. But, if you ask her who the band is that’s playing, she’ll probably say “The Cure”. Jodi is fearless. She led us through five months away. She delivered a peach of a daughter like a champ. She parents with a great combination of common sense, calmness, learning from others and reading the right books.
I guess she parents the way I cook. Maybe that’s why Norah’s so damn tasty.
Jodi, thanks so much for being one of the two greatest things in my life.
Saturday, January 29, 2011
What is the cost of your food?
I was walking through No Frills with Norah this morning when I realized that I don’t buy much in the way of prepared foods. Lasagna, pizza, frozen hors d’oeuvres, chicken fingers/nuggets/buddies, packaged diet meals and their cousins in the “Heat and Eat” family.
Why would I not buy those convenient foods? I have a busy/hectic full-time job and a newborn baby at home. Why would I not want to buy the easy and inexpensive food? How much is my time worth? How much is my health worth?
My time? Well, I know I’m not the norm in that I love to cook and bake. Throw that out the window. Let’s pretend that I don’t mind cooking, and do it when I have to, in order to eat healthy and nutritious, instead of Salty, Fatty, Preservatives and Additives. Let’s face it, most prepared food are loaded with sodium, saturated fats and chemicals with more syllables than anyone knows what to do with. And last time I checked, this wasn't the way to have a healthy life. (I also have a feeling that processed/prepared foods probably contribute to a lot of "modern" diseases)
Second, how much does the food cost? Sure, it’s cheap. FOR A REASON!!! If the food doesn’t cost much to produce, then why would it cost more to sell to you, the consumer?
Let’s assume it’s a meat-based product.
If you take care of an animal the way that animals should be taken care of, then it’s going to cost money. Prepared foods use industrial meat. Industrial meat is rife with issues like poor taste, poor nutritional value, and the possibility of containing steroids, hormones and antibiotics. Depending on what the meat is, and where it’s from. (Do you know where the meat in your prepared foods is from?)
Any time that a store is selling you something for $1, how much do you think it cost them? Less! And the distributor? LESS! And the original producer/seller? EVEN LESS!!! So, cheap food is just that. Cheap. Look up the word in the dictionary if you’re unclear of why I’m using it in a negative context here. I’m not saying frugal, penny-pinching, bargain hunter, or anything positive. C-H-E-A-P!
What can one make that doesn’t involve much effort or skill, and tastes great? Make a pesto by toasting some nuts, letting them cool and then adding them into a blender/food processor with a chopped up green herb (basil or parsley or cilantro), fresh garlic, extra virgin olive oil, sea salt and parmesan cheese, or another hard/aged cheese like reggiano or asiago. Put it into smaller containers and freeze. They can be mixed with rice, couscous, pasta or quinoa, all of which are very easy to make. Toss in some veggies and you’re set. Add some protein, like a grilled piece of meat or fish, or shrimp, or leftover whatever. Et voila. FOOD!
Real food.
Tomato sauce? Real simple. In a saucepan, over medium heat put some oil and diced onion and garlic in and cook until the onion is soft. Add diced tomatoes (fresh, or canned without salt) and continue to cook. Add an herb – basil, oregano, parsley.....along with some sea salt, fresh black pepper and some balsamic vinegar (red wine vinegar, or red wine will also work just fine!) and let it simmer, covered. Serve with any of the above, or blend with some pesto for something a little different. This sauce can be cooled and mixed together with tuna for a healthy and easy lunch option too. Put it into smaller containers and freeze for use at a later date.
Real food isn’t rocket science, and doesn’t take long at all. Cooking is seriously simple, and the reality is that if you cook and bake, you’ll be teaching your children the skills they need to look after themselves. I know we don’t all have children, but we should all be cooking, or at the very least eating real food.
Yes, I’m a parent and a teacher. But I’m also someone who benefits from the fact that I feel better about myself knowing that my wife and daughter are connected to their food and where it comes from. From me. And in many cases I know where the food is coming from otherwise, as I buy my meat from a farmer.
In closing, I hear a lot about how eating locally, ethically and sustainably is too expensive for everyone to do. And to a certain extent, yes that’s true. But, it’s certainly not difficult to cut down on buying prepared/packaged foods that are loaded with low nutritional value ingredients, chemicals and additives and wrapped in plastics that we just don’t need. I try very hard not to buy products in plastic.
Oh, and please watch this:
http://tinyurl.com/4g3jt9w
I think my new man crush is on Michael Symon.
d.
Why would I not buy those convenient foods? I have a busy/hectic full-time job and a newborn baby at home. Why would I not want to buy the easy and inexpensive food? How much is my time worth? How much is my health worth?
My time? Well, I know I’m not the norm in that I love to cook and bake. Throw that out the window. Let’s pretend that I don’t mind cooking, and do it when I have to, in order to eat healthy and nutritious, instead of Salty, Fatty, Preservatives and Additives. Let’s face it, most prepared food are loaded with sodium, saturated fats and chemicals with more syllables than anyone knows what to do with. And last time I checked, this wasn't the way to have a healthy life. (I also have a feeling that processed/prepared foods probably contribute to a lot of "modern" diseases)
Second, how much does the food cost? Sure, it’s cheap. FOR A REASON!!! If the food doesn’t cost much to produce, then why would it cost more to sell to you, the consumer?
Let’s assume it’s a meat-based product.
If you take care of an animal the way that animals should be taken care of, then it’s going to cost money. Prepared foods use industrial meat. Industrial meat is rife with issues like poor taste, poor nutritional value, and the possibility of containing steroids, hormones and antibiotics. Depending on what the meat is, and where it’s from. (Do you know where the meat in your prepared foods is from?)
Any time that a store is selling you something for $1, how much do you think it cost them? Less! And the distributor? LESS! And the original producer/seller? EVEN LESS!!! So, cheap food is just that. Cheap. Look up the word in the dictionary if you’re unclear of why I’m using it in a negative context here. I’m not saying frugal, penny-pinching, bargain hunter, or anything positive. C-H-E-A-P!
What can one make that doesn’t involve much effort or skill, and tastes great? Make a pesto by toasting some nuts, letting them cool and then adding them into a blender/food processor with a chopped up green herb (basil or parsley or cilantro), fresh garlic, extra virgin olive oil, sea salt and parmesan cheese, or another hard/aged cheese like reggiano or asiago. Put it into smaller containers and freeze. They can be mixed with rice, couscous, pasta or quinoa, all of which are very easy to make. Toss in some veggies and you’re set. Add some protein, like a grilled piece of meat or fish, or shrimp, or leftover whatever. Et voila. FOOD!
Real food.
Tomato sauce? Real simple. In a saucepan, over medium heat put some oil and diced onion and garlic in and cook until the onion is soft. Add diced tomatoes (fresh, or canned without salt) and continue to cook. Add an herb – basil, oregano, parsley.....along with some sea salt, fresh black pepper and some balsamic vinegar (red wine vinegar, or red wine will also work just fine!) and let it simmer, covered. Serve with any of the above, or blend with some pesto for something a little different. This sauce can be cooled and mixed together with tuna for a healthy and easy lunch option too. Put it into smaller containers and freeze for use at a later date.
Real food isn’t rocket science, and doesn’t take long at all. Cooking is seriously simple, and the reality is that if you cook and bake, you’ll be teaching your children the skills they need to look after themselves. I know we don’t all have children, but we should all be cooking, or at the very least eating real food.
Yes, I’m a parent and a teacher. But I’m also someone who benefits from the fact that I feel better about myself knowing that my wife and daughter are connected to their food and where it comes from. From me. And in many cases I know where the food is coming from otherwise, as I buy my meat from a farmer.
In closing, I hear a lot about how eating locally, ethically and sustainably is too expensive for everyone to do. And to a certain extent, yes that’s true. But, it’s certainly not difficult to cut down on buying prepared/packaged foods that are loaded with low nutritional value ingredients, chemicals and additives and wrapped in plastics that we just don’t need. I try very hard not to buy products in plastic.
Oh, and please watch this:
http://tinyurl.com/4g3jt9w
I think my new man crush is on Michael Symon.
d.
Sunday, January 9, 2011
On Being a Dad
(This is unedited. I know that it goes back-and-forth between my experiences and a how-to-be-a-father/partner of a newborn, and their mother. That said, I wanted to get it out, since I'm sick of hearing/reading about how having a baby is so awful and how so many biological fathers of newborns are being really s**ty fathers and partners.)
Norah was born October 8th. My last post was a few days after her birth. In the three months since, I have found a new balance in life, a new outlook on life and hope for my future like I've never had before.
All because of a 7 pound, 8 ounce bundle of deliciousness.
After taking a week off after her birth, I went back to work eager to get back into my routine, and having the chance to find a new way of doing things from day-to-day.
It's been grand.
Jodi's home with Norah, Service Canada and the Canadian Revenue Agency aside. I'm at work. The MAN is at work, and the WOMAN is at home with the baby. As it should be. Or, as it can be.
It seems to work for us.
I frequently get up when Norah seems to be stirring in the morning. Pretty much acting as an alarm clock. Whether I have my alarm set for 5:30, or later, I'm usually up at this time to change her overnight diaper. The one that weighs a TON, and is full of urine. I then lay out a towel on my side of the bed, and put Norah there, partially under the covers.
I then do whatever I want/need to do in the morning. Put a load of wash into the machine, transfer a load to the dryer, take dried laundry upstairs, make my coffee, shower, make my lunch....I kiss Jodi and Norah goodbye, and I'm off to work.
I get to work via TTC or the car, or the bike when it's warm enough out (above zero (Celsius - Canada and all) and no ice/snow/crap), and I'm there by about 7:00. I get my day together (I'm a kindergarten teacher) and execute what I didn't do the day/night before, owing to my leaving work shortly after the students leave, minus the days that I'm doing Cooking Club, or end up staying for some other unfortunate problem that may come up. I leave work "early" to get home early so that I can spend time with my wife and daughter.
I got married for a very good reason: I want to spend time with my wife. I enjoy spending time with my wife. Spending time with my wife is fun and not demanding. Spending time with my wife is a good thing. My wife ROCKS!!!
Okay, she doesn't eat fruit. But otherwise, she's pretty super duper.
And, as a mother...WOW!
But, back to my day.
I get home, and usually often a little before her cranky/fussy hour. Which isn't really bad at all. We're lucky that way. Norah's a great baby.
I'll talk with Jodi, talking about my day: pros and cons, and how Jodi's/Norah's day was. Jodi frequently has friends/family come over - to cut down on the sense of isolation, if Norah's having an off/fussy day. But again, she's a really good baby. Jodi also goes out. She goes out easier because she has the regular use of the car. I gave it up since it's not too hard (but longer time-wise) to get to work via public transit, and it makes things easier for Jodi/Norah.
Hey, guess what? You had a child and that means that some sacrifices need to be made. By both of you. Jodi's sacrifice is that she stays at home. She doesn't feel like it's punishment, but she'd much prefer to be at work. Not that she doesn't love being home with Norah.
So, I usually make dinner. I LOVE TO COOK!!! I LOVE TO BE IN THE KITCHEN!!! Not barefoot, since it means that my back is going to be killing me. I make extra dinner so that Jodi and I will both have leftovers for the next few days. Lunch or dinner. There are a ton of easy things to make that don't need much. Just the foresight (shopping) and desire to eat well, and to eat healthy.
Don't want to eat healthy? That's okay, figure out a way to eat and go with it.
So, we'll eat. Well. Either before or after Norah's bedtime routine.
Get a bottle of breast-milk (formula if there's not breast-milk option), and don't kid yourself.....having a breast-milk pump is a good thing. For everyone. Mommy is free to get away for a bit, and Daddy can be a more active/involved part of raising his baby. And all-the-while, bonding with his baby. Aiding in brain growth. Aiding in improving the odds that your baby will grow into a better functioning child, who will grow into a more well-adjusted teen, who will hopefully end up with a job that makes them happy. And might even pay enough that they can do things for you. To say thanks for the great upbringing. And making the small sacrifices that improved their lives immeasurably, but really didn't do much to take away from your quality of life.
Remember, you had a baby for a reason. It wasn't just to say that you were a Baby Daddy. Or was it? If so, then hit the road and give your baby and Baby Mamma a chance to find someone that actually cares about them, their happiness, health and overall well-being.
So, Jodi or I will get the bottle of breast-milk ready.
I'll take Norah upstairs and get her sleeper and new fresh diaper ready, along with baby lotion and diaper rash cream. I'll turn the portable heater on, since our bathroom is cold-like in the Winter. I'll start to run the bath. Not the baby bath, but the bathtub. Why the whole tub for a 14 pound baby? Because she enjoys it, and so do I. It's another Norah/Daddy bonding opportunity. She kicks like crazy, and enjoys the water. Why not do something that she enjoys.
AND I DO TOO!!!
Why not do something that I get pleasure from?
(Oh, and so does Jodi. If Jodi's happy/happier, then I'm happy/happier. It's pretty simple. You have a better chance of doing things you want to do, and with your baby's mom's approval, if you're doing something to make her happy.)
So, after we're done in the tub, I get her out, wrap her in a towel, dry myself (Oh, wait, I pretty much cleaned myself, so that I'll have a fresher bed, and happier wife!!!) and then dry Norah. I'll get the baby lotion on her, so that she's got softer skin (which is one of the greatest things in the world), and less chance of her fussing WHICH EQUALS MORE SLEEP FOR ME!!! and diaper rash cream on her butt and fat folds, so that she's happier. See above reason why.
Get her in the diaper and sleeper, and then into the bedroom and the yoga ball. Bounce her on the ball (I'm on the ball, hugging her - ANOTHER BONDING MOMENT!!!) and then get her swaddled (GREAT WAY TO GET SOME BABIES TO SLEEP AND SLEEP LONGER!!!!!!!!!!). I'll have fed her some of the bottle while she's in my arms on the yoga ball. ANOTHER BONDING MOMENT!!!!!!
I'll see if she wants to finish the bottle once she's been swaddled.
At this stage, I'll either give her to Jodi to breastfeed her, since she's in a growth spurt and therefore eating more, or I'll bounce her on the yoga ball (AGAIN, not bounce her on the ball, but bounce her while hugging/holding her) until she falls asleep. Sometimes, I'll give her a pacifier to aid her falling asleep.
While I'm bouncing her, we have an iPhone white noise app to make: WHITE NOISE!!! Why white noise? It has a little bit in common with the sounds your baby hears FOR 40 WEEKS IN THE WOMB and comforts them. It's something most of them like, and makes them happy. Remember the part that if you're baby momma is happy? Well, if your baby is happy, there's a better chance that their baby momma will be happier, and a better chance that you will be happy.
I think you wanna be happy. Don't ya?
So, put her down to sleep, turn on the baby monitor and then MONITOR what's happening. The white noise continues, and Norah sleeps. Until she's hungry. Then Jodi feeds her.
She's in bed around 8:00/8:30, and I'm going to bed around 10:30. This is earlier then I've typically gone to bed in the last 20 years. Why? So that I can get up earlier and make sure that I'm able to function properly in my job and life. Why? Because it's important that I can lead my life the way I want to, and that means that I need to be able to function at work, and otherwise.
Remember, you had a child and that means you have to make some sacrifices.
Be a man. Be a grown-up.
Sure, I drink. I have a drink or two every night. But, I don't get "intoxicated" unless I have a sense that it's going to work. Meaning, that Jodi's not left to look after Norah. Meaning, that if we're out and I end up having several glasses of wine with friends or family, that she can drive home. But I can still do all the things I need to do, I just can't legally drive a car.
I don't get drunk, since that's just a surefire way to end up with Jodi not being happy. If Jodi's not happy.....well you know how I'm doing.
Be an active part of your baby's care. The more you do to help out your baby, the happier everyone is going to be. If you want to be happy, don't be a dumbass.
Here are some things you can do with your baby. With the use of a baby carrier, you can go out with your baby. Go for lunch or dinner with a friend or friends. Go for a walk. Go grocery shopping. Go visit a friend.
Instead of spending time being pissed off about what you can't do anymore, think about things that you can share with your baby, and the time off you can give your wife....and how that will make her (and you) happier.
So, in closing:
Get your head out of your ass, it's not babysitting, it's being your baby's father.
Second, it's not a woman's job to do anything as it pertains to your child, other than carry them inside of her for approximately 40 weeks, and to hopefully be able to supply breast milk to feed your baby.
Third, the more "stuff" you do with your baby, the more his/her brain is going to grow/expand, and the better chance you'll have of not having to show your name/face in-front of a TV camera, answering questions about your serial killer offspring.
Norah was born October 8th. My last post was a few days after her birth. In the three months since, I have found a new balance in life, a new outlook on life and hope for my future like I've never had before.
All because of a 7 pound, 8 ounce bundle of deliciousness.
After taking a week off after her birth, I went back to work eager to get back into my routine, and having the chance to find a new way of doing things from day-to-day.
It's been grand.
Jodi's home with Norah, Service Canada and the Canadian Revenue Agency aside. I'm at work. The MAN is at work, and the WOMAN is at home with the baby. As it should be. Or, as it can be.
It seems to work for us.
I frequently get up when Norah seems to be stirring in the morning. Pretty much acting as an alarm clock. Whether I have my alarm set for 5:30, or later, I'm usually up at this time to change her overnight diaper. The one that weighs a TON, and is full of urine. I then lay out a towel on my side of the bed, and put Norah there, partially under the covers.
I then do whatever I want/need to do in the morning. Put a load of wash into the machine, transfer a load to the dryer, take dried laundry upstairs, make my coffee, shower, make my lunch....I kiss Jodi and Norah goodbye, and I'm off to work.
I get to work via TTC or the car, or the bike when it's warm enough out (above zero (Celsius - Canada and all) and no ice/snow/crap), and I'm there by about 7:00. I get my day together (I'm a kindergarten teacher) and execute what I didn't do the day/night before, owing to my leaving work shortly after the students leave, minus the days that I'm doing Cooking Club, or end up staying for some other unfortunate problem that may come up. I leave work "early" to get home early so that I can spend time with my wife and daughter.
I got married for a very good reason: I want to spend time with my wife. I enjoy spending time with my wife. Spending time with my wife is fun and not demanding. Spending time with my wife is a good thing. My wife ROCKS!!!
Okay, she doesn't eat fruit. But otherwise, she's pretty super duper.
And, as a mother...WOW!
But, back to my day.
I get home, and usually often a little before her cranky/fussy hour. Which isn't really bad at all. We're lucky that way. Norah's a great baby.
I'll talk with Jodi, talking about my day: pros and cons, and how Jodi's/Norah's day was. Jodi frequently has friends/family come over - to cut down on the sense of isolation, if Norah's having an off/fussy day. But again, she's a really good baby. Jodi also goes out. She goes out easier because she has the regular use of the car. I gave it up since it's not too hard (but longer time-wise) to get to work via public transit, and it makes things easier for Jodi/Norah.
Hey, guess what? You had a child and that means that some sacrifices need to be made. By both of you. Jodi's sacrifice is that she stays at home. She doesn't feel like it's punishment, but she'd much prefer to be at work. Not that she doesn't love being home with Norah.
So, I usually make dinner. I LOVE TO COOK!!! I LOVE TO BE IN THE KITCHEN!!! Not barefoot, since it means that my back is going to be killing me. I make extra dinner so that Jodi and I will both have leftovers for the next few days. Lunch or dinner. There are a ton of easy things to make that don't need much. Just the foresight (shopping) and desire to eat well, and to eat healthy.
Don't want to eat healthy? That's okay, figure out a way to eat and go with it.
So, we'll eat. Well. Either before or after Norah's bedtime routine.
Get a bottle of breast-milk (formula if there's not breast-milk option), and don't kid yourself.....having a breast-milk pump is a good thing. For everyone. Mommy is free to get away for a bit, and Daddy can be a more active/involved part of raising his baby. And all-the-while, bonding with his baby. Aiding in brain growth. Aiding in improving the odds that your baby will grow into a better functioning child, who will grow into a more well-adjusted teen, who will hopefully end up with a job that makes them happy. And might even pay enough that they can do things for you. To say thanks for the great upbringing. And making the small sacrifices that improved their lives immeasurably, but really didn't do much to take away from your quality of life.
Remember, you had a baby for a reason. It wasn't just to say that you were a Baby Daddy. Or was it? If so, then hit the road and give your baby and Baby Mamma a chance to find someone that actually cares about them, their happiness, health and overall well-being.
So, Jodi or I will get the bottle of breast-milk ready.
I'll take Norah upstairs and get her sleeper and new fresh diaper ready, along with baby lotion and diaper rash cream. I'll turn the portable heater on, since our bathroom is cold-like in the Winter. I'll start to run the bath. Not the baby bath, but the bathtub. Why the whole tub for a 14 pound baby? Because she enjoys it, and so do I. It's another Norah/Daddy bonding opportunity. She kicks like crazy, and enjoys the water. Why not do something that she enjoys.
AND I DO TOO!!!
Why not do something that I get pleasure from?
(Oh, and so does Jodi. If Jodi's happy/happier, then I'm happy/happier. It's pretty simple. You have a better chance of doing things you want to do, and with your baby's mom's approval, if you're doing something to make her happy.)
So, after we're done in the tub, I get her out, wrap her in a towel, dry myself (Oh, wait, I pretty much cleaned myself, so that I'll have a fresher bed, and happier wife!!!) and then dry Norah. I'll get the baby lotion on her, so that she's got softer skin (which is one of the greatest things in the world), and less chance of her fussing WHICH EQUALS MORE SLEEP FOR ME!!! and diaper rash cream on her butt and fat folds, so that she's happier. See above reason why.
Get her in the diaper and sleeper, and then into the bedroom and the yoga ball. Bounce her on the ball (I'm on the ball, hugging her - ANOTHER BONDING MOMENT!!!) and then get her swaddled (GREAT WAY TO GET SOME BABIES TO SLEEP AND SLEEP LONGER!!!!!!!!!!). I'll have fed her some of the bottle while she's in my arms on the yoga ball. ANOTHER BONDING MOMENT!!!!!!
I'll see if she wants to finish the bottle once she's been swaddled.
At this stage, I'll either give her to Jodi to breastfeed her, since she's in a growth spurt and therefore eating more, or I'll bounce her on the yoga ball (AGAIN, not bounce her on the ball, but bounce her while hugging/holding her) until she falls asleep. Sometimes, I'll give her a pacifier to aid her falling asleep.
While I'm bouncing her, we have an iPhone white noise app to make: WHITE NOISE!!! Why white noise? It has a little bit in common with the sounds your baby hears FOR 40 WEEKS IN THE WOMB and comforts them. It's something most of them like, and makes them happy. Remember the part that if you're baby momma is happy? Well, if your baby is happy, there's a better chance that their baby momma will be happier, and a better chance that you will be happy.
I think you wanna be happy. Don't ya?
So, put her down to sleep, turn on the baby monitor and then MONITOR what's happening. The white noise continues, and Norah sleeps. Until she's hungry. Then Jodi feeds her.
She's in bed around 8:00/8:30, and I'm going to bed around 10:30. This is earlier then I've typically gone to bed in the last 20 years. Why? So that I can get up earlier and make sure that I'm able to function properly in my job and life. Why? Because it's important that I can lead my life the way I want to, and that means that I need to be able to function at work, and otherwise.
Remember, you had a child and that means you have to make some sacrifices.
Be a man. Be a grown-up.
Sure, I drink. I have a drink or two every night. But, I don't get "intoxicated" unless I have a sense that it's going to work. Meaning, that Jodi's not left to look after Norah. Meaning, that if we're out and I end up having several glasses of wine with friends or family, that she can drive home. But I can still do all the things I need to do, I just can't legally drive a car.
I don't get drunk, since that's just a surefire way to end up with Jodi not being happy. If Jodi's not happy.....well you know how I'm doing.
Be an active part of your baby's care. The more you do to help out your baby, the happier everyone is going to be. If you want to be happy, don't be a dumbass.
Here are some things you can do with your baby. With the use of a baby carrier, you can go out with your baby. Go for lunch or dinner with a friend or friends. Go for a walk. Go grocery shopping. Go visit a friend.
Instead of spending time being pissed off about what you can't do anymore, think about things that you can share with your baby, and the time off you can give your wife....and how that will make her (and you) happier.
So, in closing:
Get your head out of your ass, it's not babysitting, it's being your baby's father.
Second, it's not a woman's job to do anything as it pertains to your child, other than carry them inside of her for approximately 40 weeks, and to hopefully be able to supply breast milk to feed your baby.
Third, the more "stuff" you do with your baby, the more his/her brain is going to grow/expand, and the better chance you'll have of not having to show your name/face in-front of a TV camera, answering questions about your serial killer offspring.
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